You know what?
Never love a person.
Never trust a person to such an extent that they can play with your heart. That they can ruin you by your words. That they can enter your life, and walk away so easily.
I , I am such a big fool.
Because I let one person do that,
I loved a person.
I don't know if he loved me or not, though he pretended he did. For some time. But that sometime was enough to fall for him. Yes now i see how cruel i ever, how I used to ignore every i love you he said, How i refused to say I love you too, How whenever he used to say that I am beautiful, i used to change the topic. He texted me everyday, every hour, it was as if he couldn't live without talking to me. But now, see for yourself. He doesn't talk to  me, says he hates me. I don't know why, still when I message him, He replies. But not like before. I guess that phrase is out oof my life. It won't come back . Ever again. I think he is taking revenge. Because i used to hurt him, he is doing the same. Sorry world I can't pretend to be over him, I NEED to talk to him, everyday, every second. How can he let go of such a bonding? Am i that bad? Yes i was bad, but that  was reluctance. What you did? What about that? I will still forgive you if you come back. I love you. But you have to promise me that you won't hurt me like you've done this.Oh sorry i should stop dreaming. it's been 15 days without talking to you. Can I kill myself? I miss you, and I will love you my dear, till the world comes to an end, I will need you, like every one needs water, You are as essential as air to me. Come back. I will be right here waiting for you.

Life

Are you alive?
Are you a human?
Do you have two eyes, two ears, two hands, two legs , one nose and a mouth?
Do you have clothes to wear?
Do you have food to eat?
Do you have everything necessary for a *LIFE* ?
If the answer to all these questions is yes, I'll consider you lucky.
Lucky because your not half dead as people in the hospital longing to live more. Live for a second more, Live to see their loved ones, live to smile and live to make other people smile.
Lucky because you are a human, who can speak, and declare your opinion, share your feelings, and have emotions. You are not helpless as the animals who live in forests,who can't live in a house as safely as you. They get poached for no reason, their pelt is taken off without their conformity. They have to search their own food.
Lucky because you are not like those people who lost their limbs in an attack. Who can't walk freely, can't talk freely, can't even eat from their own hands. Some are blind, can't see the beauty of this world, can't see what colors are. Can not experience what it is to see dust particles in the sunbeams. Some are deaf, and can never feel the pitter patter of the rain, to them every occasion is the same, voiceless, wordless, noiseless, quiet, still and tactic.
Lucky because you have attire. In a cold winter morning you don't have to be wearing a slender cotton cloth and shiver all day and night. You are not like the millions and hundreds of people who desire for new clothes, who have been in the same garments since a year. I'm sure you are wealthy enough to change your clothes every single day.
Lucky because you don't long for food beside a 5star and think that someone would pity you and give you something to consume. You have it all . You don't beg for water. You don't drink anything which is a liquid like the people on the street.
Be grateful, for what you have, for what you are, for what you have ever did, and what you know life will give you. You should not regret what pain life has given you, but be happy that at least you have something to cherish. You are lucky. Don't expect people to give you more than you deserve, to be extremely joyous don't even expect anything not even a single penny for anyone. You get disappointed, because you give reason to your life to disappoint you. Neither will you expect anything, nor will you be mournful. Enjoy what life gives you. One day or the other, you have to face disappointment and pain, its a part of life. It only makes you tough, strong, independent and more than anything happy because the mistake which made you suffer so much, would not be repeated. Learn to cherish what life gives you and believe me everything happens for a reason. Remember, Tough times don't last, tough people do.
Be appreciative that you have a life ! :)

JUST A DREAM :O

OMG ! WHAT A DAY 08:1:12. I mean what a night !
The first thing I did when I got up was DANCE. Must be thinking why? Hahaah, ‘cause actually I dreamt such silly things, yes that’s all I am telling you now, A brief summary. I had two dreams today, such mindwobbling dreams. The 1^st is the one I am telling you about, Cause the second is too personal :p
Scene: My House almost shattered, tiny tits and bits fallen all over the floor. I am surrounded by three walls. Mind it three walls. FOURTH ONE WAS NOT THERE :o . It’s not like it was constructed like this Dude, It fell or some gigantic spaceship came from it that’s why It fell on the ground.

I was so busy assessing about where the fourth wall was gone that I didn’t see my mom begging to help her.

 You know when you dream something, sometimes you know in your mind that you’re dreaming, so there is not any panic about losing the fourth wall of your house. Other than that you always have in mind that you are dreaming so you don’t even have to think once, “Omg , This cannot be real” . But this somewhat didn’t happen with me. I did not know I was dreaming and It all felt sosososo real . Seriously, the feeling I got then and there , only I know. It was disgusting in so many ways.

Ya so I continue, It happened so that in the 3^rd or 4^th time of my life I was horrified to see my mother. She didn’t actually look like my mother at first. She came to me begging for help, dressed in rags. She was disguised as something I would say a beggar, she covered her face with a Dupatta and looked in a horrible condition. So as I said, she came to me begging for help from someone called Devi . I didn’t know any Devi. I said,” I don’t know any Devi mom, What the hell is happening here? Who did this to our domicile? She didn’t quite use words, I just heard mumbles. I contemplated she was too afraid to say anything. I haven’t ever saw mom so fearful.
Then came a whooshing sound from behind, Mum instantly hid behind me. I saw a small woman coming from nowhere . As she came forward, I quickly recognized her, She was my maid, Jai Devi. And this actually is real, A woman of nearly fifty, swollen eyes, wearing a draped Sari , a cap and a sweater  because of the cold. She actually works at my house, and at this time, 10:22 is just beside me, doing the moping of my bedroom. So naturally I was not scared at all. She came close to me, And I expected her to be the same, Her words as I got it were “ Saali, Hamar paise nahi lotawat na tumne, Ab dekh kya band bajatwati hun “Translation : Bitch, You didn’t give my money back, Now see what I Do” In my dream, My Jaw open on how she was speaking like this I could not think it as real, But It all felt SO real, I couldn’t help saying “ Kya bhonk rahi hai? Tameez mein rehke baat kar, Kiske pesse , Kaunse pesse. Harami? “ Translation: What nonsense are you speaking? Be in your limits and talk to me ! Which money? Whose money? Bitch.
She instantly retored by saying, “Theeke, Milio aaj tu. Teri Maa ki Saza tujhe Dungi ! “
How would you respond to such statements? I mean, how could some one respond to such statements if your maid was speaking these? Obvoiusly you’ll laugh? I don’t know about you but I actually Laughed out loud after hearing her Not-so-expected words :p

I don’t remember what happened in the middle of this thing, But what I remember is that she came with I don’t know how many weapons installed in her saree. It was soooo hilarious to see my maid, with weaponry. No doubt she had all the firepower superwoman could have, But still I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean how could she? Well Hahahahah, I don’t know :p
Okay, the next moment she comes to me with such angry eyes like the ones monjulika has If you’ve seen Bhool Bhulaiya  and I lock myself up in my house with my mother, forgetting that my house is not a square , instead its an open figure WHICH MEANS, she can come in from the open side. I know you pity me for my dumbness. But you should pity Devi for her dumbness cause she didn’t use the open area -.-
Instead, she choose to waste her time on unlocking the front door. HOW DUMB. Reminded me she’s still a maid to me. This gave me time to think for something. I don’t know what came to my mind, but I ran to the kitchen, Picked up a thermos and put Vinegar, chilly sauce, chocolate sauce and Vim liquid in it. Yeah that’s me ;)
Then wasting no time, I sprinted en route for my bathroom! Haanji, Bathroom :p
I squeezed Head and Shoulder’s dandruff control, L’Oreal pink wala, Then Palmolive , Fem hair removing cream and like a boss, I shook it and shook it and shook it. And then I smiled, <THE EVIL LAUGH> Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha .Waiting for her to open the door,it  took hours. I sat on my sofa in the mean time and relaxed while reading a Cosmo. She finally broke in. <Sigh> Got up from my seat, Imagined I am a Power ranger and As soon as I saw her face I threw the liquid in her eyes . Yeaaaaaaaaah !
And after a few minutes of celebrating my victory, I noticed a empty bottle in her hand. Wondered what that was. Felt itchy on my face. NOOOOOOOOO I said ! It can’t happen :O
Ran towards the mirror and say acid on my face. Uwahhhhhhhhhh :’(
How could she? Bitch!
The next minute I open my eyes and see nothing. Everything is black. I wonder what new thing is happening. And to my heart’s content its my rajai and I notice *IT WAS ONLY JUST A DREAM* That’s why you saw me dancing in the morning \m/

Moon.

I've been curious since i've been small
What is this in the sky, a big round ball?
Or someone has scattered black on white
Or is it an illusion of bright light?
I used to ask Ma just as any other kid
What is that white thing, behind the clouds, hid?
My mother reassured me It a white ball of light
Takes the darkness away, along with the fright
As I grew older, I was told about it
It comes out in night, not so brightly lit
And it appears larger when its rising
While you see from a distance, Gazing
Luring a charm on you
The moon, Giving a fantastic view
The light of the moon, I Don't know why, Soothes me
It gives me a feeling, I am free.
It tells me, Whenever I like I can touch the moon
Grab it in my hand, chances are few
But i wonder , Does it follow my car
The conclusion i get: Nah, Isn't it too far?


Julliene

I am no one

Everyday when I wake up,
I pretend to smile
Keeping my sorrows away
And resolving that I Won't cry
Won't be sobbing or moaning
for the people who don't give a damn
Don't care of my existence
Don't care if every word they say
Gives me a pang
and bangs in the chest
for the don't speak anything wrong
but still manage to make me cry
then i ask myself
why o why do i always cry?
the answer i get is:
because you can't control
your emotions or motions
they Hurt you and you get hurt
you cry 'cause you can't take it anymore
So you let it all out
these calm eyes of yours, they shout
Shout to no one , but for help
Wanting to know what sin have i Done
That you treat me like no one?
That i'm not anymore in there
I am trying to figure out things, In the middle of nowhere
And everysingle night the story is the same,
I promise to god, I Won't cry again.

Hiii.

Hiii Bloggers !

Sincerely, I know nothing about blogging and all, but just saw some of my great inspirations here so I thought maybe I should also try it . I've always thought blogging has been for the intellectual kind of people and I am not even near intellectual ! I've got a horrible vocabulary and am wondering why there are no red lines for spellings mistakes here :p
Okay, So I will tell you about my life.
I am a simple girl (not that simple) living in my small world. I've got lots of friends (so-called-friends) who kind of help me at times but do back bitch. Still, Life's fun. And I've got complications, but Its okayy.
I am eating noodles right now, God they are so oily. Not Maggi , but Noodles, the road side vendor noodles.I am also online on Fb . So forget that , I'll tell something interesting.
I've got a thing for fiction, basically Beasts, evil , shadows, darkness, Death and everything.
I wish I had some good imagination, So that I could actually think Creative and Write awsome stories.
Sorry for the capital letters my fingers cannot resist the shift button :D
Umm, Aur kuch nahi Likhna .
Sooo bye for now.
See you later alligator .

Julliene .